It's funny, I look at my past and my daughter's present and think 'WOW! I got really lucky!'. So many people told me that my marriage into a ready made family would not last, but I proved them wrong.
I met my husband at work 18 years ago. Actually, he stalked me for a few days and would not go away until I agreed to go to lunch with him. After our first lunch, I fell for the bait and could not get enough of him. He was so funny and cute. In addition, he had a car and a job; that is always a plus!
At the time I was 19 and he was 29. Yep, I liked them old(er) and he liked them young! I had graduated high school 1 1/2 years earlier and he was in the process of a divorce and had 3 kids. Yes, you read right. I dated a married man that was in the process of a divorce and had a set of boy twins and a daughter. At the time, I did not think twice about his life situation. I was head over heels and had never been happier. I have to say that if my now, 25 year old daughter, told me she was in a similar situation my jaw would drop and I would immediately have a sit down with her and try to shake some sense into her after I checked his Facebook and Instagram account and then Googled his name for any type of criminal record. Technology can be great during times like this.
What can I say, I was over the top happy and ready to settle down. After only a few weeks of being together, I moved out of my apartment and into his. A week after I moved in, I asked him to exchange his black leather couch for a white sofa/sleeper bed. He complied; that was a good sign. We were a team, we combined our money, we set goals, we paid off our debts, we raised kids, we moved up in our jobs and our housing. We were molding our family and were excited about the future.
Three years after officially being a couple, we married. It was a simple wedding, but it was our wedding. He rented a tuxedo and I rented my wedding dress and shoes. Yes, I am cheap and I love myself for it and even though it annoys my husband, he secretly appreciates it.
Marriage, especially marriage into a ready made family, is never rainbows and butterflies or a picture perfect fairy tale romance. It's more like a roller coaster or a box of chocolates as Forest Gump would say. We've had our life situation stresses; teenage years, finances, family, illnesses etc... , but like I said before, we are a team. We talk, we argue, we discuss and then we come to a conclusion and move on. I will admit that I am the more vocal one and my husband is the patient one. Maybe that is what is needed in every marriage, a yin and a yang.
Looking back, beginning parenthood and marriage at the age of 19 was crazy and the odds were against us. Thankfully, my husband and I had the same thought process, 'We are in this together and not being together is not an option, no matter what.' Fifteen years later we are still holding strong and happy as ever. Our three older kids are now adults and we are now in the process of raising the three kids we created together. I would not want to be young again and have to go through the dating process all over again because quite honestly, it is a different world.
What is your wedding story? Did you marry into a ready made family, were you married into a family that accepted or did not accept you? How was it? I would love to hear your story.