All of a sudden the sonographer stopped her little mouse like object and did not leave a certain spot on my tummy. I remember she became so focused on the screen and she stopped speaking but made little noises like 'hmmm' and 'hmmm' and 'hmmm' and then she said, 'Let me go get the doctor'. That was the moment our life would change forever.
My husband and I looked at each other and were like 'hmmm'. The doctor came in and she looked at the little television screen and agreed with the sonographer with what she was looking at. She explained to us that it looked as if our baby had a heart defect and that she would immediately call the heart specialist and tell them that we needed to be seen tomorrow!
Seriously, did someone just punch me in the gut? Everything was happening so fast and words were being said that I did not understand, but thankfully our doctor was awesome and got us into a specialist the next day.
After our appointment with the heart specialist we were sent for more tests, one being an amniocentesis. This was the most emotional test that I have ever taken in my entire lifetime. Most people would think that this test was emotional because a huge needle enters into your abdomen, but it was actually emotional because not only was this a reality check that something was wrong with my child but I saw the entire procedure on a huge screen in front of me. Not to be too graphic but to be 'real', I saw the actual needle enter my abdomen and then I saw my child kicking at the needle, knowing that it did not belong in her 'house'. (I could go on a pro-life soap box right now, but I will spare you)
When you are pregnant and your baby is diagnosed with a heart defect you are told that there might be more 'problems' with the baby. After the test, I remember just laying in my bed for at least 2 days. I watched the snow outside and heard the older kids getting excited about it, but all I could do was lay and think, and cry and think some more. What else could be wrong with this kid? Wasn't a heart issue enough?
I remember the phone call from my doctor. She called me immediately when she received the test results and her words were, 'The tests do not show any other signs of defects or issues.' I started crying and had to hand the phone to my husband. I was so happy because I honestly did not know how much more I could handle.
Finding out that your child, whether it be while your baby is still in your tummy or outside of your tummy, literally feels like someone punched you in the gut. It sucks! You don't know what to expect and you don't understand the medical terms that are being used. It turns into a waiting game, a very long waiting game!
Written by: Aimee Fauci
Written by: Aimee Fauci